I'm interested into this too 
It can be quite hard getting the bike on the paddock stand when first doing it, just put a lump of wood or brick under the stand so the bike sits virtually level...but not so much so it can fall the other way..!!. You'll soon get the hang of it.Love that expression "spanner challenged"!!
That's exactly like me, not very handy with stuff like that. I think its experience too, Im just not technically minded either. Im trying to do more stuff and I think a project like the tail tidy would be a big achievement for me!
I've just bought a paddock stand so I can clean and lube my chain more easily. Just got to suss how to put the bike on it now....
Glad I'm not the only "spanner challenged" biker here.